it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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