And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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