You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Randomize
