In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
