stop calling my apartment porn island.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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