Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
