I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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