I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Randomize
