me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
