Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
