Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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