i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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