I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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