So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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