She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
