At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
ttyl tear gas
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
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