I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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