hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
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His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
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Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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