I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
