She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Holy shit dude........stairs
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
