If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Acid is not a monday night drug
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Randomize
