Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
