they need to just BURY HIM!
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize