somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I think I sprained my soul last night
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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