i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
