I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
