he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
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