let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
