they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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