I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize