so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
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yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
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I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
the raccoons are back...
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