i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
