It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
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I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
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Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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