Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
