whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
