PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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