He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
