Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
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We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
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Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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