matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
please don't ironically join a cult
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