he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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