One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
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