I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
