the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
its not stalking. its research.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
