my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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