what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
