I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize
