I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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