She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
