I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
