he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Randomize
