So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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